Free Love
by PianoHands121
Summary: Jasper is a talented artist who has a thing for redheads with long legs. As a fan of the, "Love em and Leave em" lifestyle, love has always come easily to him, without costing him. But when he runs into Edward he learns that true love isn't always free.
1. He Runs Away

**A/N: Slash? No WAY! Who coulda thunk it? Well, from this moment on, this is as slashy as slash gets. Don't like it? Piss off; what were you doing looking for Edward and Jasper pairings, anyway? Don't like cussing- well, the plots good, try to ignore it. *grins broadly* If you're not mature enough for M (hence the big, capitol M) find you're entertainment elsewhere. Now go read the fuckin' story.**

Chapter One

_Fuck. I'm late. Again. _

Wonderful, absolutely brilliant. Fantastic. The toll of my coffee- withdrawal was kick starting quicker than usual, reducing me to infuriatingly laconic thoughts. I tipped the espresso to my lips, hissing as the searing liquid scalded my upper lip. I growled vehemently.

_What wouldn't I do to just _kill _somebody right now-_

Wish granted. A hard body slammed into me brutally, pushing the air out of my lungs and sending me flying. I caught myself, the crumpled Styrofoam cup spewing its contents all over my gray polo and messenger bag. I whirled around, gnashing my teeth like a deranged dog.

"Fuck!" I screamed, looking down at my shirt and bringing my offender under my heated glare. I froze.

Wavy brown red hair- no, _bronze_ hair. Apple green eyes, like freshly picked granny smiths. Apology and sheepishness lingered in them along with a deep, rooted sadness. A beautiful blush appeared, spreading across his perfect milky skin- _wait a fuckin' minute… HIS? As in a MAN? _

Jasper Whitlock may be many a thing, but he was not gay. I have nothing wrong with gays, my best friend, Peter, is as fairy as they come, but me?

I love pussys. I love fucking them, I love eating them; I love soft hands and collagen lips wrapped around my cock.

Even as I assured myself of this, I felt my pants tighten as… _he_ picked up his books, giving me full view of his round ass. I almost moaned.

"I'm s-sorry!" He cried suddenly, pinning me with his now watery green eyes. His chest shook with a sob.

"Hey," I said, more softly than I intended. He looked up, his surprise showing. I cleared my throat and put on a blank expression. "Don't worry about it." I tried to sound nonchalant, dismissive. He blushed again and looked down, a shy smile gracing his full, pink lips. I almost reached out and yanked his chin up. I wanted to see those green, green eyes…

"Are you alright?" His musical tenor rang out. I snapped my eyes back into focus. I grimaced.

"Yeah. Gotta go." I blurted, wanting to get away. I surged forward in the mass of bodies that flowed out of the fine arts building, ducking into my room, running away, just like I always had.

Fuck, was I getting tired of it.

**A/N: If you feel the need to be uber awesome, review! Peace.**

**~PH**


	2. Heart Dropper

**A/N: Eddies POV of Chapter One! **

Chapter Two

Chirp.

"Alice, please. Not now. Shush."

Chirp. Chirp.

"Alice!"

Silence.

Chirp!

"For the love of God, Alison! Christ!" I exclaimed, sitting up in bed. No Alice.

I picked my cell phone. New Message: Alice

I groaned but opened it up anyway.

Ed-

Just wanted to say good luck on ur 1 day of college! Eeek! So excited 4 u!

Love, Alli

I ran a hand through my hair and sighed tiredly. _Shoot._ I needed to get ready.

I pulled off my t-shirt and boxers and furiously brushed my teeth while the shower started up. I looked into the foggy mirror and wiped a patch of it. The bags under my eyes were worse, my face looked drained of all its color. _Hell_, I thought, _my whole life seems drained._ I looked down, drawing in a deep breath, slowly tracing my scar that ran from my shoulder to my hip. A few more decorated my chest and arms, not to mention the newest ones on my wrists. Battle wounds, Allie had called them. Said they showed that I was a survivor. I thought they only showed weakness.

The water in the shower was too hot, but I didn't turn the hot water lower. I shaved hurriedly, flinching when my razor slipped and clipped my chin. Ow.

I grabbed my books and compositions from the night before and rushed out the door of my apartment building.

I gazed longingly at the neighboring Starbucks but decided that I shouldn't be late for my first class, nor was coffee breath needed. I had flipped open to a page in my piano notebook and was considering revising the fifteenth measure during my free period before Composition class \when I ran into him.

And I mean _ran into him_.

I barreled into his side, all my breath leaving my lungs in a painful _whoosh_. I heard a low, dangerous growl and I squeezed my eyes shut. _Calm down, Edward. You're safe. People are around you, he's not here. He's gone. He's gone…_

"Fuck!"

My eyes flew open. The most beautiful man stood not inches from me, chest heaving in anger.

I was out and proud, as you would say, and had known long before I'd had my accident. But never had I wished I could have someone like I did then. If only…

He stared at me unabashedly and I felt my face heat up. God, did I feel like an utter idiot. I could see him and his buddies later tonight, drinking a few beers and talking about women's breasts, laughing boisterously as he told them the story about the freak he ran into today…

He continued to look at me incredulously and I noticed the spreading coffee stain on his shirt. I bent down for my books, stammering out a pitiful apology, trying to control my tears. My face, in the meanwhile, grew warmer and warmer.

"Hey," came a rough, sultry voice. It reminded me of the wind flailing against a rock, unyielding.

"Don't worry about it." He continued.

He had flaxen, honey-kissed curls that flopped rebelliously in the wind and cerulean eyes that showed warmth and certain endearing almost childlike mischievousness. His mouth was the color of caramel and quirked in a wicked grin. I blushed, convinced that he must have noticed my blatant appraising. He seemed lost, his eyes trained on mine. I hoped I hadn't given him a concussion.

"Are you alright?" I asked, concerned. His eyes snapped into focus. He looked at me and frowned.

My heart fell from my chest to my ankles.

"Yeah. Gotta go." He ran past me and all I could do was move around him and glance once over my shoulder and see a whip of honey disappear into the fine arts building.

**A/N: See how stupid communication is sometimes? Makes ya mad, don't it? If you want a yummy little sneak peak of what's to come in later chapters, review! I'll send love and Jasper and Edward! **


	3. Green Green Eyes

**A/N: Don't own it. If I did, Jasper and Edward would've killed Alice and Bella and then lived happily ever after. Half of the teenage girls in America would faint.**

Chapter Three

I prayed I wouldn't run into Mr. Green Eyes about as many times as I dreamed of his perfect, soft lips on mine. I cruised through my classes for the next week, mind on something else entirely…

I was just about to give up on ever seeing my green eyed beauty ever again when I heard an unmistakable voice.

"Oops! Sorry. Oh, Gosh, I'm _so _sorry!"

My lip twitched, pulling up into a crooked smirk. I heard a gasp behind me and then a slight shuffle.

A throat cleared, then more shuffling. I bit my lip to stifle a chuckle.

"Excuse me, but, uh-" He warbled from behind me. I spun around, a playful smile on my face.

"Yes. Sit here…please." I shocked myself with the _please._ Jasper Whitlock never begged… until now. He blushed and I noticed he had a pair of fuckhot glasses resting on the bridge of his nose. His eyes seemed even more vibrant, dark, thick lashes framing them. He tugged on his brown turtleneck nervously, then flashed me a shy smile. He kept his eyes downcast and slipped into the chair beside me. An earthy smell washed over me, drowning me.

"Um," He stammered, biting on his bottom lip. I watched, transfixed. He glanced up, then back down to his long, elegant fingers that were rested on his pencil. My mind skipped ahead to better things his hands could be on… I blinked the thoughts away fervently.

"Jasper Whitlock." I thrust my hand out. He hesitated, then his hand was in my own. Cool, thin fingers wrapped timidly around my wrist.

"Edward." My dick twitched at his name. I immediately imagined myself above him while he writhed in pleasure beneath me, my eyes clenched shut, thrusting, the only thing on my lips his name…

He quickly stuck his hand in his pocket and ran a hand through his auburn locks. He nodded but didn't look at me throughout the lecture.

I could feel his body heat beside me. I could smell him. I could hear him scratch a note or two.

I wanted to feel him, though. To crawl inside his skin and never come out.

And that scared me.

I decided to at least focus partly on the lesson; otherwise I could kiss my scholarship good-bye. I came from a wealthy family from Texas, but my brain was what got me here. That and my art.

I had seen Edward multiple times around the arts building after we had collided. I could only imagine him playing the piano, what with his musical voice and slender fingers. After the professor assigned pages in the textbooks to read over and dismissed us Edward shot up and practically bolted out the door. I ambled behind the rest of the class, hoping for a glimpse of bronze or smear of apple green. I didn't have any more classes that day since I had an art exhibit open down town that afternoon. I took my time in getting there, smoothing my curls out flat against my head. I shoved my hands in my khakis, kicking rocks across the way. I nodded toward the receptionist and dutifully remembered to sign in.

I plastered on a wide, Cheshire grin and shook hands with a few people, mostly women, who recognized my work. They all remarked about how talented I was for such a young man. And I always laughed heartily and replied with a heavy southern drawl, "Thank you, Ma'am."

A flash of bronze and pale skin. My heart slammed against my rib cage frantically, wanting to leap out and join another. I nodded deafly to the woman who was blithering on about my newest sketch and stepped toward him. I controlled my breathing tempo and smirked. I stopped behind him, surreptitiously inhaling.

"Do you like it?"

He stiffened. Alarm seized him and panic rolled off him in waves. My arm shot out and wrapped around his chest, stretching across it from shoulder to shoulder.

"Hey." I tried to laugh liltingly. "It's Jasper."

I stood a few inches taller than he, but when he turned he was looking into my eyes.

Brilliant green.

"Yes." He said simply.

I furrowed my eyebrows, confused. He smiled softly though. His cherry lips spread across his dappled skin. "Yes, I like it. Do you know the artist?" Edward asked.

I grinned broadly at his new found confidence. Perfect, I thought. He should never have to feel nervous around me.

"Yes," I teased him, mimicking him, "You're lookin' at him."

Edward's jaw hung slack and I chuckled.

"You?" He whispered. My arm was resting on the curve of his back and I drew it back before nodding. "Jazz, this is wonderful! Gosh, the intensity of it just rears back at you! You're amazing!" I normally would have responded with a cocky 'I know' but refrained when he blushed fiercely. That blush…

I could only guess that the last part was spoken out loud because the blush deepened.

"So, Jazz, huh?" I queried. My mama and Peter both called me Jas.

"Yeah, sorry. I won't do it again." He murmured, resembling a puppy who'd just gotten kicked. I remembered back in Texas we had a dog name Marty. Whenever my daddy got drunk and mama yelled at him, he'd beat that poor dog just for lookin' at him. One day when I got home Marty had run away. He stuck to hittin' us after that.

"Na. I like it." I responded, smiling. He returned it and we walked on to someone else's painting and I pointed out brush strokes or color usage, babbling on almost embarrassingly. Anything to keep him with me.

I felt his eyes on me, sinking into my skin and making me hard again. I looked back at him. He quickly snapped his eyes down to study his shoes.

I nudged his chin up with a crooked thumb lightly. Edward looked back up at me, wide eyed. I felt my cheeks warm. _Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid! He probably isn't even gay. _Did that mean I considered myself gay? I thought of attractive men I'd met. No, they didn't appeal to me like Edward did. So was I like… He-sexual?

Edward didn't say anything after that, and I sincerely thought I'd fucked up big time until he stopped and turned to me while I was walking with him out. He seemed to gather up some of that confidence I'd seen earlier and rewarded me with a crooked grin. Then he reached into my front pocket. I froze for a moment. His hand was warm and oh-so close to my hard on. Panic gripped me. No-fuckin'-way was he not gonna notice it! I jerked away, but I was too late.

Edwards green-green eyes widened even more in the dim lighting. I thought that that strawberry stain on his cheeks wasn't ever gonna come out.

"I-I'm so s-sorry!" He stuttered. "I just wanted to put my number in your phone!"

I laughed nervously. "Hey, man, it's cool. Here," I said, reaching in my other pocket and handing him my phone, flitting my eyes away from his, too ashamed. _Shit!_

He typed in his number almost frantically and said good- bye. I watched his car drive away before getting snatched up by the night's huge fist.

**A/N: I love me Southern Jasper! Reviews are welcomed, no matter what! Pinky swear!**


	4. Sea Room

**A/N: Eddie's POV of Chapter Three**

Chapter Three

I _hated _crowds. People pressed in on me from all sides, crushing.

_Oh, Gosh. I can't breathe… I'm suffocating… Blackness…_

I broke free of the tightly compressed mob with a choking gasp. I drew in a deep, ragged breath, the frigid cold tainting my lungs. I shuddered before having someone knock into me from behind, making my teeth clank together. I muttered a slew of pathetic apologies on my way into History, wincing every time someone wheeled around to glare at me.

Honey.

My words fell immediately from my throat

Someone pushed past me and I quickly shuffled away from the doorway, swallowing around the knot in my throat. I glanced back up at the man's back before drawing myself up and striding hesitantly toward him. I cleared my throat, fighting the urge to clamp my eyes shut.

"Excuse me," I started off steady, sure before I faltered. "But, uh-"

Color was starting to come to my face but I blanched as he turned around to smile at me. His eyes were even richer and piercing than I remembered, and his hair was longer, just so that it would stay in the bun he had it in on the nape of his neck. He had beautiful straight teeth; his newly exposed jaw was sharp, drool worthy…

His plump lips moved, his eyes never straying from mine, they remained inviting, so I sort of slipped into my seat, determined not to screw this up. He was still looking at me, so I tried to start up a conversation.

"Um…" I began, and then promptly shut my mouth. I chewed on my lower lip, keeping my eyes trained on my pencil.

Hand.

It was a handsome hand-

I thanked whatever God there was that ceased my ludicrous thoughts as Honey Man smiled widely.

"Jasper Whitlock." I inwardly moaned at his name… the lazy, appropriately honey like first name, and then the sudden, sharp last name. Like the unbridled buck of hips- I shook away the sporadic thought.

"Edward." I breathed, flinching at the huskiness dripping from my voice. Jasper's eyes flashed dangerously, but I felt no fear, only all consuming lust. I nodded fervently before returning my eyes to the front, my hands twitching in their unwanted places in my pockets.

I couldn't concentrate at all though, his smell had reached me about half way through the lecture when he shifted, removing his leather jacket in a natural movement, his shoulder then imperceptibly closer to mine. I swallowed, eyes widened, just staring at that shoulder. My eyes made quick work of the rest of his newly revealed skin. Broad shoulders against navy stitching, forearms dusted with blonde. The edge of a tattoo peeked out, entwining his arm. His waist dipped in, narrow and sporting loose fitting, faded, well worn jeans. Abdominal muscles barely showcased and-

Sweet Mother of God.

Puckered in the cool atmosphere, his nipples strained, revealing to me the outline of two metal bars.

He. Has. Nipple rings.

I jerked my head back around, halting my ogling when he glanced at me. I looked at my lap and almost groaned.

For the first time since my accident, I was raging hard. I wanted to cry. Out of amazement or embarrassment, I don't know.

I practically ran out the door when the bell finally rang, putting an end to the twisted, ironic purgatory I had been sitting through.

Sometimes when I was little my mother would take me and Alice to the nearby art museum. She would leave us in a small, abandoned corner in the landscape wing while she went to the forbidden renaissance wing. Alice would toddle around on short legs while I sat Indian style, staring up at the paintings. I can't remember the exact shade blue of that room, but it had always enveloped me. There were no display cases; the only light was from a wheezing, stuttering fluorescent. There were five paintings, all of the ocean. One was of the waves in mid- crash on the rocks, reminding me of my dad, powerful and quick to anger. The second one was of a picture perfect beach, bright and pure. Definitely Alice's painting. Then my mom was represented in the third; a moonlit, shadow licked ocean, fingers lapping eagerly at the pristine sand. The next was how I saw myself, the ocean was iron gray, a smooth surface, but in the very corner a looming cloud pulsed with dark veins like a sick, frantically beating heart. An omen of what would be the next scene if there was one.

The last one was my favorite, though no one I had ever met matched it. Nothing but the water was visible; the sky barely peeked at the very top. The painting was solely of the water, the waves barely arching up to meet the sky in a flurry of spray, frozen on the canvas. A piece of seaweed or two floated care free, cradled and rocked by the waves.

5 years after my accident, I had come back to Chicago; to the museum. To the sea room as I called it. All that was left were the holes the nails had made, and the outline of where five pictures had been pinned for so many years.

I asked the owner of the landscaping wing where the ocean paintings were.

"I'm sorry, lad." The man had said gruffly. "Shipp'd 'im off teh that old museum up in Briarswood." At my crestfallen face he sighed, then glanced around before leaning in. "C'mere. The old man who owns the place, I've heard is in a little bit 'o debt. I'm sure he wouldn't mind teh get a few paintin's off a his hands, now?" He winked merrily and I grinned for the first time in months. I hunted all five of those paintings down, all the way to Colorado where one was stashed away in a storage unit.

I squinted at the painting in front of me before exhaling. I turned away, hands deep in my pockets, very self conscious of the few eyes that watched me. I pushed my glasses up, wrinkling my nose at another dull, lifeless painting. I shuffled on, skipping several, before stopping. Hundreds, thousands of yellows poured together, bending, hiding, revealing, and twisting to form a set of hands clasped together, the first reaching down for the other. I stood there, people brushing by me, chattering on, but I paid them no notice.

"Do you like it?" A deep voice asked close to me. My mind raced.

"_No, just- no…." I blubbered, tasting my tears as they burned their way down my cheeks. He laughed, like the cruel song of a bell. He laid bite marks along my back before growling into my ear, his breath hot and foul. I sobbed. He put himself inside me, making me whimper, trying not to make him mad._

"_Do you like it? I know you do, Eddie boy…" He asked. I screamed, thrashing around in his lethal grip. _

"_Come now, Eddie… Here, I'll sing you another song." He cooed. This brought on another round of kicking, louder, hoarser shouts. "Please! Oh, God, please!" _

"_Three blind mice, Three blind mice," He began, running a knife down my shoulder, the blade barely sinking in. "See how they run, see how they run," He started then on my chest, leaving a few bloody lines. "They ran after the farmer's wife," He crooned, withdrawing the knife before jabbing it into my shoulder. I felt my eyes roll back in my head, eyelids fluttering, muscles tensing around the foreign object that ran down my whole side, "who cut off their tails with a kitchen knife…" Release came for him, making him stop moving in me. He slumped, heavy on me again. "Have you ever seen such a thing in your life, as three blind mice…."_

"Hey," a beautiful voice laughed, "it's Jasper." An arm was wrapped protectively around me and I relaxed. I turned to look at him, his eyes peering into mine. I almost gasped. I smiled softly.

"Yes." I said slowly. Jasper looked at me questioningly and I smiled even bigger. "Yes, I like it. Do you know the artist?" I asked. He smirked, crossing his arms, which was… distracting, and leaned forward.

"Yes," He joked, "you're lookin' at him."

I gaped. "You?" I breathed, and he bit his lip unconsciously before nodding. I almost squealed. "Jazz, this is wonderful! Gosh, the intensity of it just rears back at you! You're amazing!" I gushed before clamping my mouth shut. I felt my cheeks begin to redden, most likely transforming me into a skinny, sickly looking tomato.

"That blush…" Jasper muttered, staring at me intensely, making me shift around and get hotter.

"So. Jazz, huh?" He asked, arching an eyebrow at me. My face fell.

"Yeah," I murmured, more embarrassed than ever. _God, Edward. You're so- DUMB! _"I won't do it again."

"Nah," he drawled, grinning at me. "I like it."

We walked on; every now and then he would stop and turn his face away from me to point out a painting or sculpture, allowing me to drink in his features with him unaware. His head snapped back to mine, making me look down, my face coloring at an alarming rate. _Shoot. Well, this has been fun, Edward, but what are you going to do now that he knows you are a little queer? _A surprisingly dark voice inside me leered.

Warm, calloused fingers brought my chin back up. My eyes widened. He stared at me for a few moments before looking away. He was silent for a second before we fell back into an easy, light conversation again, my chin tingling.

Too soon we were by the entrance. I turned to him, spurred on by a quick decision. I quirked my mouth up in what I hoped was a smirk before diving into his front pocket with my hand. My hand did not find his phone however…

I looked up at him, panic clouding his face. Jasper, warm and hard beneath my touch was… _hard. _I stuttered out an apology. He just nodded before we exchanged numbers hurriedly, too mortified to speak. And with one last look into his sea room eyes, I dashed out into the steadily falling rain, the door swinging behind me. Maybe I had found my fifth painting.

**A/N: Oh, God. FINALLY! Finally it's complete! I don't know why but this took forever to write! I had exams, then more exams, bleh, bleh, bleh. Anyway, PLEASE review! It makes me aware of how wonderful Fanfiction viewers truly are! 3**

**~PH**


	5. Please

**A/N: ****I am so sorry for the LONG wait! Chapters will be coming at regular intervals now (hopefully) so I hope you enjoy! Hm… What else? Oh yeah! I'm not Stephanie, so… I'm not the creator of these beautiful boys! Read and Review! Thanks!**

Chapter Five

I floated into my apartment, a goofy grin glued to my face. I knew that it was utterly insane, me thinkin that way about a _man_, for fucks sake! But… It was Edward. I smiled, he was the only fuckin exception.

Edward. God he was fuckin perfect. I ignored the fact I was soundin like a girl back from her first date. I froze, feelin a knot tighten in my stomach. Shit, what did I do now? Should I call him, ask him out? How do I even know if he likes guys? How do I tell him I don't like guys, just…him? For the first time in my fuckin life I was unsure. I grumbled to myself for a while before grabbin my laptop and surfin the web. I hesitated before quickly typin in; _gay_

About a fuckin million search results popped up.

_Gay dating, Gay marches, Coming out…_

I held the mouse over a link. _Free gay vids._ I clicked, squeezing my eyes shut before I could chicken out. I bit my lip before openin them.

A tall dark haired boy was kissin a slight, blonde boy. They made out for a little while before takin off their shirts and gettin on the bed. Soon the blonde had taken off the taller one's jeans and had taken him in his hand. The camera zoomed in on his face as he closed his eyes and licked at him reverently. The brunette moaned, fistin his hands in the blonde's hair and tossin his head back. I gulped, imagining Edward doing that to me. I rubbed myself for a moment as I closed my eyes, hearing his groans, pretendin they were Edwards. I unzipped my jeans, slippin my hand inside.

I pictured Edward on his knees, his hot mouth on me. I stroked up and down, sighin at the feeling. He looked up from my cock, those green eyes filled with lust. I twisted my hand as I came up, hissin as I brushed the head. Edward hummed happily around my cock as I fisted my hands in his sexed up hair. I tugged faster now, my hips buckin up. He took me in deep, moanin all the way. I gasped, feelin that tightenin in my balls. I fucked Edward's mouth harder, sped up my hand. I let my head fall back and groaned loudly.

"Fuck, oh shit, Edward!" I screamed his name as my orgasm crashed down on me hard, curlin my toes and bucklin my knees. I breathed heavily, slumpin back in my chair, the video playing on, forgotten.

I quickly leapt into the throng of people headin for their classes, being jostled violently. I held my sacred coffee high above my head, like a proudly flying flag. I knew I looked like a fuckin idiot but-

Someone bumped into me, hittin me in the middle of my back, my coffee sloshin dangerously close to the side. I bit my tongue, tasting coppery blood.

"Shit."

"Shoot." Was the answering reply. I smiled toothily at Edward.

"We've got to stop meetin like this." I teased him, watchin him flush under my gaze.

"It's probably just because our classes are held in the same area at the same time," He mumbled, running a hand through his tousled hair. Fuck, he was so cute.

"Hey, do you want to catch lunch at the café later?" I asked, jerking my head in the direction. He nodded silently, a smile tuggin on his cupid bow lips. We made our goodbyes before headin to our classes. I sipped at my coffee as I practically skipped to art. I almost ran into someone but skidded to a stop.

"Shoot, man, I'm sorry." I walked on before realizin what I'd said. My grin grew even larger; I could feel my dimples straining against my facial muscles. But in a way, it felt good.

I passed a door, slowing down as beautiful music leaked out. My breath caught in my throat, my heart eagerly body slamming the insides of my chest, strugglin to get free. I opened the door and slipped inside, the sound growing, washing over me.

Edward's back was to me, and strangely I wasn't surprised it was him. Somehow I had _known_. I crept closer silently, listening intently. I could see his long, pale fingers gliding over the keys, caressing them intimately, like a lover. He grew softer, nodding his head, allowing me to see his face. His eyes were screwed shut, mouth open, breathing readily. He'd never been more stunning. His long, angular nose, full lips. A pink tongue peeked out and licked his lower lip.

Suddenly Edward's eyes flew open but he said nothing. The music stopped abruptly, and he swung around to look at me. Hurt flashed in his eyes. I understood, I was an alien and to him I was entering his mysterious, sacred world. We both were still, frozen in time. Blue pouring, mixing with emerald. I was the one to break the spell, stepping forward.

"Please," I whispered, and Edward looked at me, confused. My body itched to touch him, needing contact. "Please, don't stop." I begged. My hand brushed against his arm as he slowly turned around, facing his piano again. I held my breath. He hesitated before continuing.

The sound was sad now, slow and barely audible. It rose, trailing into dangerous notes of foreboding and unwanted pity.

It softened, followed by a string of possessive notes. Then came a portion that seemed monotonous, endless, haunted. He spun into a crescendo, the chords hopeful and pleading and his sleeves began to ride up on his arms.

I gasped, the sudden noise slicing through the bubble that had been created around us. Edward turned to me, startled.

His arms were covered in scars. They mottled his otherwise smooth, creamy, innocent skin. Like a horrific dream, Edward jumped up, tears coursing down his cheeks. He looked so broken, so helpless. His sudden movement knocked the bench over, his small, frail body hunched over.

"Edward," I started, reaching out to him. He moved away like a scared, injured animal and my heart broke. "Edward, what happened? Who did this?" I bristled with anger, jerking him by his shoulders to look at me.

"Don't touch me!" He screamed, sobbing. My eyes widened at his outburst, but I pulled him closer nonetheless. "I ruin everything I touch," he said shakily, trying to escape from me. I grabbed his hand in mine, and pressed it to my face. He wriggled in my grip but I stayed firm. I breathed in his smell, closing my eyes briefly. He stared at me through watery eyes.

"Please, Edward." I whimpered, the words heavy with meaning. He rested his forehead against mine. We simply breathed into the other for a while, sharing everything we could, including our own air.

"Jasper," He sighed my name. He slipped from my arms and backed away, shaking his head. "I can't ruin you, Jasper." He whispered.

Then he was gone. And the room was cold and empty.

**A/N: *hides behind computer* Please don't hurt me! **

**Review if you likey or have any suggestions!**


	6. Can't Anyone Hear Me?

**A/N: Smiles proudly. See! I told you I could do it! Regular intervals! Now, *rubs hands together* I think I should get a reward! How about…REVIEWS! They are sooo yummy. And truly make me want to update faster. Kay, 'nuff of my incessant rambling. On with the show! Err…story! **

****Chapter Six

Walking away from him was the hardest thing I had ever done. My chest ached with the weight of my heart, growing with every step I took away from Jasper. I rubbed away the tears, wiping my face fervently, determined. Why did it feel like my heart was breaking all over again when I had been the one to leave him? How was there anything left to be shattered?

Without realizing it I had started running across campus, gasping for air, my lungs burning. I stopped once I had gotten far enough away and lay down underneath a tree covering me from the now falling rain. My face was dripping with water, whether from the sky or my crying I didn't know. I sobbed, pulling at my hair with my hands. I rose to my knees and cursed up at the sky. It was black and rolling with threatening clouds. I screamed, crying out in anguish. It just wasn't fair.

"Please!" I shouted, not knowing entirely what I was begging for. My throat became raw from screaming.

"_Please!" I cried as soon as I was sure James was gone. I thrashed around in my binds, feeling the rope cut into my flesh. I screamed the sound deep and carnal. I arched off the ground, yanking furiously. _

"_Can't anyone hear me?" _

I sobbed for so long the rain finally stopped, droplets clinging from every blade of grass, every leaf.

A lone raindrop slipped from the last vanishing clouds clutches and plunged down in a free fall. It seemed to regret its ill planned suicide attempt and latched onto a leaf just above my head, hanging on. It almost sighed in resignation, before releasing its hold and fell down to earth and soaked into the welcoming dirt beside my hand. I stared at the place where the receiving earth quickly gulped up the water.

The sky mourned for the loss of its friend and let out a final crashing boom.

I had no idea what I was crying for. My old life? Jasper?

I swallowed. Yes, Jasper. Perfect, untouchable Jasper. I couldn't ruin him. He was too good.

"Jasper." I whispered. I hung my head, one more teardrop falling down my face and off my chin.

Suddenly warm, strong arms circled around my waist. I usually would have called out, but this action was comfortable…and familiar. The person's front was pressed against my back, and their heat made me realize how cold I had become.

Instead of leaning away I moved back, getting even closer. I laid my hands on his, gasping.

"Edward," Jasper spoke. I shivered at the feeling of his hot breath on my neck. He was so warm, I thought distractedly. So, so warm. I turned into him, our noses brushing up against each others. Every inch of our bodies were touching, his hard, sturdy form against my lean, fragile one. I kept glancing from his beautiful grey-blue eyes down to his coral pink lips, so tempting, inviting… They pulled up slightly and I was glad to realize that I wasn't far enough into his carefully spun web not to blush at my blatant appraisal being found out. He smiled sweetly at me. We stood there for a while, me in his arms. He didn't look away from me, and he didn't utter a word. I opened my mouth to apologize, thinking that was what he was waiting for. He put a finger to my lips, letting it trace my mouth for a moment before dropping his hand back to my hips.

"Jasper," I whispered and he drew me closer still. His lips were so close, and they ran along my jaw, up to my mouth. He breathed into me. Just as our lips were about to meet, I fell, and Jasper caught me.

His face was still near mine and my eyes fluttered as I tried to remain conscious.

"I've got you," He murmured before moving his lips to mine in a chaste, sweet kiss. His lips were soft against mine, warm and welcoming.

My last thought as Jaspers lips left mine was _home._

**A/N: So…? Do I get reviews? Please, please, please, please PLEASE? Lemons will come sooner! *giggles maliciously***


	7. Mine

**A/N: Mwhaha. Second on time update. Kinda. I was on hiatus so I couldn't work on the story, but, I'll try to make this a habit. But only if I get reviews! They look so pretty! I love seeing I have another cuz it makes me feel…good. *winks***

**Oh, and yeah. So not Stephanie. Poop stick in a turd bowl. **

Chapter Seven

I looked down at the man's face that had changed my life so quickly, but so irrevocably in just a few short days. His eyes were closed and he had gone limp in my arms, his red lips still slightly wet from my kiss. I pulled him up with little difficulty, he was much too thin, and buried my face in his hair. Edward's arm was still slung around me and I felt him fist my sweatshirt in his sleep. He smelled like sweat and oranges, along with grass and rain and dirt. I smiled; the combination was strange, but perfect. I picked him up bridal style, chewing at my lip, torn. Should I wake him? I glanced over at his ethereal face and remembered his tired eyes. No, I'd let him sleep. I settled him into the car seat before climbing in myself.

I didn't know where he lived so I just drove us to my house, looking over at my sleeping boy once every few minutes. Edward mumbled while he slept and I had to put a fist to my mouth to catch the giggles that threatened to escape. He was cute as fuck talking bout shit like, "So warm," and "Jasper's _my _spider."

Edward began to stir around the time I was pulling into the parking deck of my apartment. I quickly parked the car and unbuckled, moving over toward him. I placed a hand on his cheek as he slowly opened his eyes.

"Edward? Edward, wake up, darlin. We're home." I said softly.

Then Edward smiled at me. That small thing made me the happiest man alive.

"Hi." He said shyly. I grinned down at him, absentmindedly drawing closer and running my hand through his messy auburn locks.

I leaned all the way into him. "Hi." I replied. I went for his lips, needing to know this was real, _he _was real but Edward recoiled. I looked at him in confusion and he chewed on his lip, playing with my fingers.

"I've never… kissed before." He mumbled through closed lips. I smiled softly pulling him to me. His eyes fluttered closed, waiting. I placed a kiss on his nose, then on the face of his palm.

"Show me." I whispered and he opened his eyes, their beauty surrounding me.

"You are so beautiful, Edward." He opened his mouth to protest but I swallowed his words by capturing his lips in a soul searing kiss. Edward stiffened in surprise at first, before relaxing in my arms and tangling his hands in my hair that had escaped my ponytail and touched my shoulders. I moaned quietly into his mouth, moving my lips against his in a dance that I knew had been choreographed long before the life of either of us.

Kissing Edward was different, but the same in so many ways. His lips were fresh, clean, not like the girls I had kissed. Their mouths covered in sweet gloss. His mouth was just as full as most women, but his lips were more demanding. _Raw_, I thought, _everything about him is so raw. _And I loved it.

I ran my tongue hesitantly along his bottom lip, asking for entrance. His lips parted slightly and I began to plunder his mouth. We both released a groan as Edward's arching back pushed his denim covered cock into mine. I reluctantly pulled away from the kiss with a sigh, and Edward peppered my neck with kisses. I gasped as I felt him nip at a sensitive part of my neck, before sucking the skin into his mouth.

"Oh, _fuck._" I cried, bucking into him. I was so fuckin turned on that my Edward was _biting _me. _Marking _me. He let go of me soon afterwards and grinned proudly at his masterpiece on my neck. He pecked it once more, looking up at me with a goofy grin. I couldn't help but chuckle, lifting up off of him. He pouted and I gave him a mischievous look.

"Jasper?" He asked timidly. I growled before throwing him over my shoulder and making my way to the lobby.

"Jasper! Put. Me. Down!" He said sternly, pounding on my back before becoming limp and falling into a fit of giggles. We both laughed and he smacked me on the ass a couple times. I growled again, popping him on his butt. I loved this playful side of Edward almost as much as I loved shy, sweet Edward.

"Hey, Rick." I said nonchalantly as we passed the concierge desk. I felt Edward wave a little at the old man gawping at us and giggled.

"Hi." Edward said shyly, hiding his face in the curve of my back.

I put Edward down once we reached my apartment, opening it up for us and grabbing his hand.

"Well, this is it." I said, rubbing the back of my neck as I watched Edward look around my medium sized apartment. A few shirts were tossed around, and the dirty dishes lay piled up in the sink He went over to my small workspace by the window. His back was to me as I watched him look at all my artwork. He put his hand on my latest, a series I was starting. All the colors were greens, the lighter shades and the darker ones coming together to create a pair of wide, innocent eyes. Edward slowly turned to me, and I felt the distanced between us like never before.

"Is this…" He trailed off, his eyes unfocused, a slight frown on his face.

I was by his side in an instant, my arms around him.

"I am sorry, E. I should have asked you first, I know-" I begged him and I felt his fingernails bite into my arms like thorns. He shook his head violently, bringing his face to mine.

"Jazz, it's beautiful," he smiled sadly. "But they are so...innocent." he whispered, burying his face in my neck. I felt hot tears soak into the collar of my shirt and I pulled him to me, settling us on the couch.

"You are innocent, baby. You are-" I tried to comfort him but he wriggled from my grasp.

"No, I'm not Jay!" He cried. "I'm dirty! Don't you underst-" He sobbed but broke off. His actions contradicted his words as he clung to my neck and pressed his lips to my skin.

"Oh, E." I whispered.

"I'm scared, Jazz. I don't want to ruin you." He said quietly, looking up at me with watery eyes. He tried to hide his face in my shoulder but I held his chin.

"You could never, baby." He looked away from me but I pulled him closer. "E," I said more firmly. "You could _never_."

Suddenly Edward's mouth was on mine, the kiss clumsy and his teeth knocking into mine. But I didn't care, I could feel him smiling into the kiss, and I grinned as well. Soon we were just pressing our goofy smiles together, breaking it up with sloppy, happy kisses.

_Best kiss of my life_, I thought.

I lay on the couch later that night, the sun had gone down and the room was bathed in moonlight. I had wanted to take the couch and put E in my room but he had refused, making himself comfortable on my chest.

He drew designs on me lazily, our faces still close. To an onlooker this might have looked strange but this way his eyes burned into mine, and he was near to me. I could breathe him and smell his breath, washing over my face. He sighed happily every few minutes, running his lips down my throat and tasting me. I kissed his forehead and kept my lips there, threading my fingers in his hair. His knee slipped in between my legs and we were as close as possible.

I started to move us into the bedroom but a soft murmur from E told me he was asleep. I smiled, snuggling into his warmth.

I stayed awake, pondering my good fortune. Edward seemed to have a past, I had fallen for a man, and we were both fully grown men sleeping on a _very _small couch. I was here, _snuggling_, for the first time in my life-

My thoughts were interrupted by Edward's mumblings. "Mom! You know I hate cobbler."

I snorted. _And_ I probably wouldn't get _any _sleep. But, this _man_ (I still needed to get used to that) was my world now. He was beautiful and strong, honest and kind.

"My Jay," He murmured, sighing into my neck.

And he was mine.

**A/N: Again, I'm REALLY sorry that this update's a little behind schedule, but pretty please leave reviews! I see all these other AMAZING stories that have a ton! And *bashful, kicks feet* I would like a ton, too. *looks up underneath lashes* **

**Hey! You there, enjoying and/ or hating the story! Review! Yeah, I said it! HEY! I mean it, review! If your still reading this that means you haven't! *scowls* *mutters* Traitor. :P**


	8. Needed

**A/N: Hi! Lemony goodness may or may not ensue…so kiddies beware! If you don't like boy on boy lovin' get the hell outta here! :P**

Chapter Eight

_I felt nothing. I was only dimly aware that he had come back and was running the blade down my back again. It was followed by rivulets of blood. I didn't scream. I didn't cringe or shy away from his unwanted touch. Every breath that wracked my chest I suspected to be my last. All I had to do was wait. Wait to die, and, if I admitted it, my foolish wait for freedom. The numbness would come and go, the spell was broken this time by him slamming the door angrily and stalking out of my room. I flinched, everything coming back. _

_The floor was a mixture of urine, blood, and semen. I was roped to a mattress in the corner of a motel room, that much I knew from hearing him and the others talk. _

_I was completely bare, my wounds unattended, blood caked on my body. _

"_You look so pretty in red, boy." _

_I could barely see because my eyelashes were clumped together with dried blood, but I heard the door close, his heavy boots nearing me. _

_He straddled my stomach, pushing his knees into my chest, making my lungs scream for air. _

_He stuck a sweaty, grimy finger in my mouth._

_He soon replaced it with his penis, shoving it in my mouth. I pursed my lips, whimpering, leaning away from him. _

_He brought the knife down to my shoulder, digging it in, twisting it, making me cry out. He stuffed it in, making me choke, sputtering around it. _

"_Suck it, boy." He growled while thrusting his hips, making me gag as his penis slid down my throat. _

"_Suck it like your momma sucked it," he laughed. Tears spilled at the corners of my eyes as I sobbed silently. _

_I prayed for numbness again. _

"_Your momma had such a good mouth, she did. I made her suck my cock while you and your daddy watched. Do you remember, boy?" He grabbed my hair and yanked. _

_I yelped and he laughed again, deep and low. "Do you remember what happened next? Do ya, boy?" _

_He pulled my body down, putting himself inside me roughly. _

_I screamed, my insides clenching, trying to drive out the foreign object. He moaned, pushing in and out. _

_I smiled dreamily as numbness drew me close to her, blanketing me. I dimly heard him curse at me and put down the knife to hit me and grab my face. _

"_I fucking killed her!" He screamed, his words cutting worse than his blade and burning more than his cigarette butt through my bliss. "I fucking gave you this knife, told you to kill the men that were beating her fucking head in. But you just cowered in the corner as your dad tried to fucking save her. You couldn't even protect her then! She must fucking hate you! You could have saved them! You could have fucking saved her!" He stopped yelling, mouth open wide. He collapsed on top of me, chest heaving around the knife lodged in him. His blood poured out of him, falling on me hot and thick. _

_I let go of the knife, gasping, trying to suck in as much air as I could under his heavy frame. I fought off the darkness threatening to close in and gathered all my remaining strength to roll away from him. _

_I shuddered, looking over at his limp body crumpled on the floor. _

_I cut the ropes binding me to the mattress, moving fast to the window. My weak body protested as I tried to open it._

_A gust of fresh air hit me, smelling of honey. Jasper. I smiled. He was waiting. _

_James grabbed me around the waist and I screamed. _

"_Where are you going, boy?" _

Someone was shaking me violently, desperately.

"Edward? E? Wake up, darlin, it's just a dream."

I gasped, my eyes shooting open.

I clung to Jasper as if he was my life preserver, and he held me even tighter.

I could feel that my face was wet, and in turn the collar of Jasper's shirt was damp.

My teeth chattered even though in Jasper's arms I was anything but cold, his warm lips were pressed anywhere he had access to.

I fisted my hands in his hair and pulled him on top of me, wanting to forget. I kissed him fervently, eyes clenched shut. Jasper was hesitant, but wrapped his arms around me and kissed me back. I moaned my approval, blindly fumbling around for his shirt buttons. He walked us to his room, his hands never leaving me. We fell on his bed, me beneath him, loving the feel of his body on mine.

I finally managed to unbutton the first, rocking up to meet Jasper's hips.

"Edward," he hissed through clenched teeth, bucking into me, causing his cock to rub against mine deliciously. "Edward, stop." I shook my head frantically, kissing him harder, deeper. My heart sunk as Jasper pushed me away from him, his face sad. He frowned.

"I'm not your escape route, Edward." He said harshly.

I flushed violently, unable to stop the inevitable flow of tears. "You don't… want me?" I whispered, looking at my trembling hands.

_Of course he doesn't,_ a cold voice spat at me.

Jasper placed his warm, calloused hands over mine, covering them.

"You know I do, E. I want you so bad." He said, his voice shaky. He kissed me tenderly on the forehead, pulling me into his lap. I stiffened, sitting awkwardly in his arms for a moment with a petulant pout on my face.

Jasper huffed. "You don't believe me, do you?" He shifted us so his stomach pressed against my back, with both of us lying down on the bed. He intertwined our fingers and slid them up my shirt, resting them there against my heated skin.

"So soft," Jasper murmured before taking my shirt off.

I gasped, squirming around and yanking my hands out of his. I tried to cover myself, clenching my eyes shut, knowing the disgust I would see if I opened them. I felt Jasper try to pry my arms away and I whimpered.

"No, Jazz. Ugly, ugly," I protested weakly.

"Edward," he said sternly and I opened my eyes. He kissed me gently, then kissed the scars on my neck. I let out a shaky sigh and tried to relax. He peppered the scars on my chest with kisses, only stopping to suck on my pebbling nipples.

I groaned, feeling my cock that had gone flaccid stir to life.

"Please," I whispered. Jasper shushed me and continued down my body, pressing his sweet kisses all over my ugly, undeserving body, kissing every scar and blemish.

By the end of his ministrations I was burning up, arching into his soft kisses. He placed a final kiss on a small silver scar over my heart.

I chuckled at his proud smile as he crawled his way back up to my lips.

"That one doesn't go with the rest," I said carefully, not wanting to make a slip up. He rested his head on my chest, his warm breath fanning out on my skin and making me shiver.

"Tell me," Jay said, tracing the scar. I cleared my throat.

"Well, I was 7 and-" I started but Jasper shook his head.

"No, tell me," He touched the long, pink scar that ran along my chest and side. "About these." His blue eyes searched mine. I remained silent.

"Edward." He prompted.

"A group of men," I began, fingers trembling inside of Jasper's.

Long, tapered fingers ran through my hair reassuringly. I took a deep breath, knowing I couldn't stop now or I would never be able to tell him.

"A group of men broke into our house one night seven years ago. We had just moved from Chicago, I was fifteen and openly gay. Then we moved to Mississippi, and, as you can guess there were quite a few people who were out to get me. They made my mom…do things while my dad and I watched. Then he did things to me, and afterwards started beating my mom with a crow bar. He," I paused, feeling Jasper pull me into him. "He gave me the knife. Told me to kill the guys that were killing her. He fucking gave me the knife! And I didn't do it! Why didn't I do it?" I sobbed, smothering myself in Jasper and breathing his honey in. "My dad tried to save her. I remember that he held my head and made me watch as they killed them. And they, they liked it. The fucking bastards liked it! He took me and kept me in this motel, locked away. He would come in everyday and rape me, and everyday he would hurt me more. I remember the last day; I knew he was finally going to kill me. I had been waiting for him to do it, every morning I would wake up and feel weaker, more tired. Like play dough stretched too far. I remember him saying horrible things to me, his words were like poison, and everyday he would give me a little more, just enough to draw me closer to death. But that day," I looked up to see Jasper's face covered with tears, his chest shaking against mine. His tears fell onto my face, and it strangely comforted me. "That day what he said was too much. I picked up that knife and killed him. All I remember next was waking up in an ambulance, the paramedics telling me an elderly woman had found me stumbling around in the street, naked after climbing out the window. I stayed in recovery for six months, then was released to my mother's sister, Esme. Her and her husband, Carlisle, took good care of me and my sister, Alice. I went back to school, graduated a year after my sister, even though she's two years younger. Then I came here. And I met you," I stuttered through the last bit, feeling my cheeks redden.

Jasper's face was pressed against mine again, his honey breath filling me up.

"How is it possible to feel so much for you, when we just met a week ago?" He croaked, chuckling.  
A teardrop slid down his cheek and onto his mouth, dangling there. I kissed it, pulling back and licking my lips, tasting the saltiness. Something flashed in his eyes and he crushed his mouth to mine, lips wet and mouth open. He sucked my tongue into his mouth and I tugged his shirt off. I gently touched his barbells, making Jasper bite his lip and groan. We slowly rocked together, and I began to feel strange. My stomach tightened painfully but pleasurably and I gasped.

"Jasper?" I cried out, frightened. He immediately stopped and looked at me, concerned. "I'm sorry!" I stammered, tears falling. "I thought I was ready, but…" Jasper shushed me, kissing me. I would never get used to the feeling of someone's lips, especially his, on mine. Jasper chuckled, and I grew bright red in realizing I had spoken aloud.

"I'll have to get you used to it," He smiled sadly, kissing me again and brushing my hair with his hand. "You are so beautiful. I've never, ever wanted a man before. Not before you. All I want to do is make you feel good, sweetheart. Will you let me do that?" He asked and I nodded hesitantly. "I'll never let them hurt you again. Mine now, mine." He mumbled against my shoulder as he reached between us and started to unbuckle my belt. I gulped, feeling my heart clench in a bad way, and as if Jay could feel it too, he stopped.

"It's okay, E. See? I have my pants on and they aren't gonna come off. I wont even take off your boxers, okay? I love you so much." I gasped at his words but he didn't seem to notice he had said them. He started to fumble with my belt again but I stopped him. He glanced up at me and I saw my tears land on his golden honey skin.

"What is it, baby? We don't have to-" He said soothingly but I shook my head, giving him a watery smile.

"You, you said," I blubbered, "You said that you," realization dawned in his eyes and he kissed me passionately.

"And I meant it, baby. I meant it. I love you, I love you, I love you. I don't know how, I didn't even know something like this was possible. To feel, like this…" He broke off, holding my face. I kissed him, slowly. I nodded and he pulled down my pants, throwing them on the floor. He stared at me, devouring my body with his eyes. But this time I didn't feel ashamed. I felt wanted. Needed. Jasper lowered his hands to my cock, the head sticking out from my boxers. He touched it softly, the feeling sending a jolt through me.

"Unh," I couldn't help but groan. Jasper stared at me again, licking his lips.

"Please, Jasper." I begged. "Please touch me,"

His warm, calloused hands pulled my cock from my briefs, and I arched into his hand. He wrapped his fingers around it and tugged.

"Yes," I whimpered. He stroked me slowly at first, but then after I pleaded for more he sped his hand up. Before long I was moaning out loud, the sound filling the apartment.

Suddenly I felt something warm and wet touch my cock. I looked down to see Jasper's big blue eyes staring up at me, his eye lashes fluttering. His lips around the head of my cock.

"Oh, fuck!" I cried out. I felt a hot tongue slide along my cock to the base. He took as much of me in as he could and I couldn't help but fist my hands into his hair. I wanted so badly to just fuck his mouth but didn't want to hurt him. So I just played with the hairs on his head. I felt myself nearing the edge and I tossed my head on the pillow. I tugged hard on his hair but instead of coming off of me he paused before letting out a low moan. I looked down to see him pulling out his cock and fisting it, pulling it with hard strokes.

"Jasper, stop," I said breathlessly, "I'm gonna, oh, fuck, Jasper! I'm gonna-" and I felt my body shake as I opened my mouth in a silent scream. Jasper swallowed around me, trying his best to take all I had. A little bit dripped out onto his chin. I finally opened my eyes to see Jasper watching me hungrily before clenching his eyes shut.

"Fuck! Edward!" He screamed before emptying out into his hand. I moaned again, rubbing my used cock against his stomach, shaking from aftershocks.

He cleaned us off with some tissues before pulling me under the covers again. He sighed happily into my hair, wrapping himself up in me. I turned around to face him, pushing my face into his again, our eyelashes brushing.

Noses smushed.

Mouths placed sloppily, long limbs hanging haphazardly over the edge of the bed.

It was too hot under the covers and in his arms. I could feel us both begin to sweat.

Neither of us protested or said a word. I stared at his blissful face and felt my heart thump loudly.

"I love you," I whispered into his mouth.

His lips curved into that wicked grin of his in reply.

**A/N: Soooo? Good, bad? Unf, I have to admit, it was my first lemon. I'm a virgin slashifier. But tonight I got my cherry popped! So, tell me how it went! It got me all squirmy… REVIEW! **


	9. Fuck Gentle

**A/N: Yeah, I'm still alive. Haha, sorry! But, maybe a few people remember me and will read this! Enjoy!**

Chapter Nine

One minute I was watching Edward come undone by my hand, and the next I had my lips wrapped around him.

_There's a cock in my mouth, there's a _cock_ in my mouth!_

_Yeah, but it's the most perfect cock in the universe attatched to the most perfect man!_

Green eyes shot open, red mouth a perfect 'o'. I flicked my tongue around the head, tasting him. Whoever said that shit tasted good was a goddamn liar. But my cock was as hard as a diamond listening to those sweet moans, and the picture of his flushed chest and tight neck thrown back made me grind my hips into the side of the bed. I barely was able to keep my eyes open, and I watched as he curled his fingers into my hair, not pushing but holding on desperately as I licked all the way down the shaft and tried to get all of him in. He was longer than I was, but I was thicker, and I pulled off him for a moment to look up at him. His sides heaved and he mewled, shifting his hips against my open mouth. My eyes rolled to the back of my head, and I was certain I was gonna bust the zipper on my jeans. So I quickly unzipped myself and fisted my dick, taking Edward back in at the same time. I moaned, low and deep, making him gasp and buck up into my mouth. I gagged a little but kept on, those hot as fuck mewls spurring me on. I heard him gasp loudly and looked up at him, seeing his eyes trained on my hand. They were almost black, lids low and mouth hanging open.

He tossed his head back hard, neck straining and tried to pry me off him, telling me in a breathy voice that he was close. I moaned as his fingers scratched deliciously through my curls, and sucked on him harder. Hot spurts hit the back of my throat, surprising me but I quickly gulped them down, the hand wrapped around me speeding up. I cursed, licking my lips to catch the last bit of him as my orgasm swept over me. I collapsed ontop of Edward, face buried in his neck, knees shaking. As soon as I could walk I cleaned us off, watching Edward sigh happily and curl around me, my body echoing his. Heat bounced between us but I pulled him even tighter, resting my chin on his.

The sound of his next words barely reached me in my almost comatose state, but I could feel his lips move on mine, and I knew.

Golden light streamed in from the blinds on the window and I buried my face in a warm pillow to block out the disturbing sun. Then I remembered I didn't have a window in my bedroom. My eyes groggily blinked open, catching sight of pale, alabaster skin. I smiled, looking at our position. The covers had been kicked away, and our legs were entwined, our bodies facing eachother. Edwards hair was even more mussed up and I pressed a soft kiss on a freckled shoulder. I ran my hand down his scarred, but otherwise smooth, chest; resting on his stomach, fingers splayed across his hip bone. His eyelashes fanned across his cheeks, lips pursed in a way I couldn't resist. I kissed him, drawing back when he stirred. He mumbled something and turned his head before stilling.

A wicked grin crept over my face as I slowly inched my way down his body. I traced my pinky down his shaft, stifling a giggle as even in his sleep his face flushed. I licked my hand, eyes trained on his face as I wrapped my fingers around his half-hardness. I bit my lip to stop a moan when his foot grazed my dick as he wiggled.

_Please wake up._

His eyes scrunched up and his mouth opened, his hands twitching before coming to rest on my bicep. Not too long now, I knew and placed my mouth on his nipple. I licked the nub, keeping my strokes slow and teasing. I heard a gasp above me and chuckled, lifting my head up from his chest.

"Good mornin, beautiful." I murmured, catching his lips in a kiss before resuming my stroking. He sighed, moving his hips into my hand in time with my strokes. Soon, he was gasping and whimpering and placed a hand on mine.

"Stop," he breathed, pulling me up and kissing me. "I wanna touch you," he said shyly, blush warming his cheeks. I groaned.

"Oh, dear lord. Please do." he giggled as I flopped down on the bed, hands above my head. Edward moved behind me, grabbing my hands in one of his and holding them there. He slipped a knee between my legs and I could feel him against me, _there. _A change of angle and he would be inside me. I shivered and he nuzzled into my neck, sucking on the skin there. I could do nothing but gasp and moan my appreciation as he trailed a slender hand down my chest and further. He panted in my ear and I could feel his dick twitch against my ass. I pushed back onto him, making his hand tighten around me.

"Do you like this, Jazz?" He asked huskily into my hair, making me gasp. The voice didn't belong to my Edward, but it still stirred a deep, throbbing in my stomach. "Huh?" He growled, bucking into me, making my cock push through the circle of his hand. I moaned, helpless to his minstrations.

"More," I pleaded, thrusting weakly with my hips. He held them down, making me groan in want.

"You like my cock against your ass," My eyes widened and I hiccuped, making him laugh darkly. "You do, don't you, Jazz?" He chuckled, rubbing against my lower back. His hand froze on my cock, causing me to whimper. "Tell me,"

"Yes!" I shouted, squirming frantically back against him, making him let out a growl. He pushed me so I was face first on the mattress and I let out a yelp in surprise. He stopped and let go of me suddenly. "Gah!" I cried as I felt teeth sink into my shoulder, then a tongue dart out and soothe the skin.

"You want me to fuck you, don't you, Jazz?" came the voice again, making me shiver. This Edward was dangerous, and somewhere, deep in my mind I knew I should be afraid. I whined, trying to find relief by pressing against the mattress. He grabbed my hips, lifting them up and away from the bed so I was on my hands and knees, head in hands. A hand yanked me up by my hair and I let out a needy moan.

"Please, E." I begged, grabbing his hand and moving it to my dick. "Make me come! I'm so hard it hurts!" I exclaimed. His tapered fingers twisted over the end of it, making my head fall back to his shoulder. I could feel his length sliding between my cheeks, and I clenched, making him growl. And all of a sudden we were moving. Him against me, so close to where I ached for him to be, with his hand on my cock. He pinched and rolled my barbells, making me hiss and arch my back against him while his mouth worked on my neck. I rolled my hips against him, and he released one of his sexy mewls into my ear again.

"God, I can't hold on much longer, Jay." He panted against my neck before licking a long stripe to my ear. I could already feel the coil tightening in my stomach and my balls draw up.

"Fuck! Me too," I moaned, rocking into his hand harder.

"Come on, Jazz," he growled. "Cum with me."

And with another sharp thrust I felt him cum, and he let out a shout and bit into my neck, _hard._ That was all it took to throw me over the edge into the strongest orgasm I'd ever experienced.

As we came down, a shaking, quivering mess Edward opened his eyes.

"Oh my god, Jasper!" He exclaimed and I blinked up at him. "I am so sorry!" He cried, tears welling up in his bottle green eyes. I frowned, reaching for his hand but he jerked away, sitting on the end of the bed away from me, head in his hands. "I don't know what came over me," He whispered and I crawled over to him and grabbed his chin.

"What is it, darlin?" I asked, my voice trembling. My hand shot up to my neck and I felt the skin there. It was broken and I knew it would leave a mark.

"I told you, I'm messed up!" He wailed, getting up and pacing with his hands on his head.

"Edward, people do that sometimes in the act of-"

He laughed coldly, before grabbing my hand and dragging me to the mirror in the bathroom.

"Look at it, Jasper! I've ruined you!" He said, tears streaming down his face. I stared at my reflection. My lips were swollen and my neck and shoulders were covered in hickeys, but a huge bruise was already surfacing where he had last bit me.

"Edward-"

"I'm no better than _him!" _He screamed, pulling at his hair and scratching his face.

"Stop it," I yelled, ripping his hands away and placing mine on his face. "Look at me," I growled, holding his head still. "Look at me. That was the most amazing experience of my life," I began and glared at him when he scoffed. "It was," I brushed back a lock of his hair. "Don't ruin this for me,"

"I really was too rough, Jazz. And besides, don't you, ya know...?" He trailed off, looking at me questioningly.

"Oh...Oh!" I said as realization dawned on me. I sat on the edge of the bed and motioned him to do the same.

"E, you went through a really traumatic thing," I said, gripping his hand tightly. "I would never, ever ask you to give me something I couldn't give to you, darlin."

"You're not them, Jazz. It doesn't matter if it's you." He answered fiercely. Then he frowned. "You do want me like that, don't you?"

"Shit, darlin, 'course I do," I laughed, pleased when he did the same. "But for the first time," I whispered huskily into his ear and listened to his breathing pick up. "I wanna feel you inside me,"

He shuddered and his eyes darkened with lust. "God, Jazz. I never thought I'd be so-"

"So what, babe?" I asked, sucking on his ear lightly.

"Normal," He grinned and pushed me down on the bed, making me grunt. I couldn't pin this Edward down, so domineering with a smirk and a glint in his eye but a blush spread over his cheeks.

"Sorry, Jazz, I'll be gentle." He whispered, trailing feather light kisses down my body. I growled and flipped us over, making him squeal.

"Fuck gentle."


	10. Author's Note

**\**

**So, I'm sorry if anyone thought this was an update, but unfortunately its not. I haven't updated in a long time because I'm not really feeling the story as much as I used to. My writing style has also changed, so the only way I would be continuing with Free Love is if I deleted it and started over. has been pissing a lot of people off as well lately, myself included, and so I probably am going to be sticking with one shots if I decide to update anymore. I'm sorry for the inconveniece and thanks for the support!**


	11. Author's Note Two

**A/N: Okay, I promise this is the last one. **

**I've decided I am going to continue Free Love after all, but I can't promise regular updates...Thank you everyone who is still with me!**

**See you soon!**

**~PH**


	12. Pity

**A/N: **

**Yay Free Love! I missed these two(sad face). Sorry its a tad short, but hey at least its something. Enjoy!**

Chapter Ten

**EPOV**

I was the big spoon this time around and I held Jasper with loose arms. He had long ago fallen asleep, his broad chest rising and falling with each breath, a waft of honey washing over my face. He looked so strong and beautiful, and it shocked me that someone so small and ugly as me had actually hurt him. I reached out a trembling, pale hand and lightly traced the crescent shaped bruise, fingers dipping down into each indentation. I shuddered, Jasper following suit at the unwelcomed coolness of my hand. I drew my hand back under the duvet and allowed myself to warm against his hard body.

Sometime during the night I must have fallen asleep, because when I woke up, the sun was halfway through the sky, and the bed was empty. I laid in his bed a minute longer, burying my nose in his pillow and breathing him in. I slid down and out, my foot touching paper. I stopped and picked it up, taking in the scrawly handwriting I recognized.

_Read_ _Me_, it said, finished witha clumsy heart. I fought back a smile, guilty pleasure filling me and eagerly flipped it open.

_Dear E, _

_I just couldn't bring myself to wake you up this morning, you looked too damn good nestled in my bed like that_

I snickered 

_I have a twelve oclock class, then after I'm going to visit my mom in Brooksville. It's only about an hour's drive away, so I should be back before it gets dark. _

_You can wait for me here, or you can head back over to your house...Hell, who am I kidding, I really hope you wait for me. _

_I love you, _

_J_

I sighed to myself like a love struck girl, and held the letter to my chest for a moment. I laughed at myself and gently placed the note back beside the bed before heading into the small bathroom connected to the bedroom. I quickly showered and brushed my teeth, looking into the misty mirror and almost gasping.

My green eyes shone out from my pale face, and the bags that usually lingered under my eyes were visibly faded. I touched my face with a cautious hand, sure that the image in the mirror wasn't mine. I looked easily ten years younger, and smiled at my reflection tentatively. In a moment of glee I drew a quick heart on the mirror. I laughed again for the second time that morning, and practically skipped out of the bathroom.

A quick glance at the alarm clock beside the bed told me it was half past one so I hurried out of the bedroom to the living room.

I took in all the dirty dishes and laundry thrown around and couldn't help but smile to myself and shake my head. I made quick work of the dishes and started a load of laundry. I looked again at the time, sighing when I realized only thirty minutes had passed. I sighed and sat in a comfortable arm chair next to the tv.

I woke up to an excruciating but familiar pain in my shoulder, crying out as sitting up jostled it. I grimaced and looked down at my arm, noticing with fear that my shoulder had slipped out of socket again.

_"Where you goin, boy?" I screamed as a harsh tug yanked my shoulder and pulled me back to him. "C'mon, Eddie boy, lets sing a song..." _

I whimpered as I grasped my arm by my elbow, struggling to fix my shoulder like I had to all those years ago. It hadn't done this in a long time, the doctor having fixed it along with the rest of my body. The living room was dark and Jasper would be back any minute. I shuddered to think about what he would do if he saw me, he would undoubtedly take me to the doctor and would hate me for ruining his plans. I gritted my teeth, pushing even harder on my shoulder and yelped when with a sick pop it jumped into place. The caustic pain was replaced with a deep ache and I trembled.

I heard the unmistakable sound of a door close and looked up through hazy eyes.

"Edward?" Jasper gasped and I flinched at the horror in his voice.

Grocery bags covered the floor around him, and his wide blue eyes stared at my shoulder. Shocked and piteous. I squeezed my eyes shut. Jasper had never pitied me.

I finally looked up, but the look on his face was indecipherable. Well, until now.

**A/N: Okay, I know, I know. But it'll be okay, trust me guise. Now, reviews make me leave my schoolwork in my backpack in favor to write, so, your move. Thanks!**

**~PH. **


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